My octopus is better than your octopus!

So, I'm just sitting here in bed (mattress on the floor) eating my lindt lindor truffles, and I was thinking, it would be really cool to have an octopus as a pet. Imagine, a squishable, lovable mollusk capable of injecting you with copious amounts of venom. I'd sure like that. The octopus is my favorite animal, and on a serious note, I would like to have one. Octopodes (proper plural form of octopus, octopuses is also acceptable) are quite the odd animal. However, they wouldn't seem so strange if they were domesticated. People would just have an octopuspalooza party. Octopodes on leashes, windows of pet stores, man's best friend.
But the underground would be equally as dark.
Akin to cock fights: Puss Fights!
"My octopus is better than your octopus!" is something you'd hear often as they engaged in mortal combat.
I'm quite the rambler. Oh baby.

House-broken? I think so

I wish I could just have a giant octopus, and I would ride him everywhere. It'll be keen.

Cool story bro.

Night, babies <3